diff --git a/server/src/creators/account-creator.js b/server/src/creators/account-creator.js
index 67d091861..783d6f5ae 100644
--- a/server/src/creators/account-creator.js
+++ b/server/src/creators/account-creator.js
@@ -1,158 +1,176 @@
 // @flow
 
 import invariant from 'invariant';
 import bcrypt from 'twin-bcrypt';
 
 import ashoat from 'lib/facts/ashoat';
+import bots from 'lib/facts/bots';
 import {
   validUsernameRegex,
   oldValidUsernameRegex,
   validEmailRegex,
 } from 'lib/shared/account-utils';
 import { hasMinCodeVersion } from 'lib/shared/version-utils';
 import type {
   RegisterResponse,
   RegisterRequest,
 } from 'lib/types/account-types';
 import { messageTypes } from 'lib/types/message-types';
 import { threadTypes } from 'lib/types/thread-types';
 import { ServerError } from 'lib/utils/errors';
 import { values } from 'lib/utils/objects';
 
 import { dbQuery, SQL } from '../database/database';
 import { deleteCookie } from '../deleters/cookie-deleters';
 import { sendEmailAddressVerificationEmail } from '../emails/verification';
 import { fetchThreadInfos } from '../fetchers/thread-fetchers';
 import { fetchKnownUserInfos } from '../fetchers/user-fetchers';
 import { verifyCalendarQueryThreadIDs } from '../responders/entry-responders';
 import { createNewUserCookie, setNewSession } from '../session/cookies';
 import type { Viewer } from '../session/viewer';
 import createIDs from './id-creator';
 import createMessages from './message-creator';
 import { createThread, createPrivateThread } from './thread-creator';
 
+const { squadbot } = bots;
+
 const ashoatMessages = [
   'welcome to SquadCal! thanks for helping to test the alpha.',
   'as you inevitably discover bugs, have feature requests, or design ' +
     'suggestions, feel free to message them to me in the app.',
 ];
 
+const privateMessages = [
+  'This is your private thread, where you can set reminders and jot notes in private!',
+];
+
 async function createAccount(
   viewer: Viewer,
   request: RegisterRequest,
 ): Promise<RegisterResponse> {
   if (request.password.trim() === '') {
     throw new ServerError('empty_password');
   }
   const usernameRegex = hasMinCodeVersion(viewer.platformDetails, 69)
     ? validUsernameRegex
     : oldValidUsernameRegex;
   if (request.username.search(usernameRegex) === -1) {
     throw new ServerError('invalid_username');
   }
   if (request.email.search(validEmailRegex) === -1) {
     throw new ServerError('invalid_email');
   }
 
   const usernameQuery = SQL`
     SELECT COUNT(id) AS count
     FROM users
     WHERE LCASE(username) = LCASE(${request.username})
   `;
   const emailQuery = SQL`
     SELECT COUNT(id) AS count
     FROM users
     WHERE LCASE(email) = LCASE(${request.email})
   `;
   const promises = [dbQuery(usernameQuery), dbQuery(emailQuery)];
   const { calendarQuery } = request;
   if (calendarQuery) {
     promises.push(verifyCalendarQueryThreadIDs(calendarQuery));
   }
   const [[usernameResult], [emailResult]] = await Promise.all(promises);
   if (usernameResult[0].count !== 0) {
     throw new ServerError('username_taken');
   }
   if (emailResult[0].count !== 0) {
     throw new ServerError('email_taken');
   }
 
   const hash = bcrypt.hashSync(request.password);
   const time = Date.now();
   const deviceToken = request.deviceTokenUpdateRequest
     ? request.deviceTokenUpdateRequest.deviceToken
     : viewer.deviceToken;
   const [id] = await createIDs('users', 1);
   const newUserRow = [id, request.username, hash, request.email, time];
   const newUserQuery = SQL`
     INSERT INTO users(id, username, hash, email, creation_time)
     VALUES ${[newUserRow]}
   `;
   const [userViewerData] = await Promise.all([
     createNewUserCookie(id, {
       platformDetails: request.platformDetails,
       deviceToken,
     }),
     deleteCookie(viewer.cookieID),
     dbQuery(newUserQuery),
     sendEmailAddressVerificationEmail(
       id,
       request.username,
       request.email,
       true,
     ),
   ]);
   viewer.setNewCookie(userViewerData);
   if (calendarQuery) {
     await setNewSession(viewer, calendarQuery, 0);
   }
 
   const [privateThreadResult, ashoatThreadResult] = await Promise.all([
     createPrivateThread(viewer),
     createThread(
       viewer,
       {
         type: threadTypes.PERSONAL,
         initialMemberIDs: [ashoat.id],
       },
       { forceAddMembers: true },
     ),
   ]);
   const ashoatThreadID = ashoatThreadResult.newThreadInfo
     ? ashoatThreadResult.newThreadInfo.id
     : ashoatThreadResult.newThreadID;
+  const privateThreadID = privateThreadResult.newThreadInfo
+    ? privateThreadResult.newThreadInfo.id
+    : privateThreadResult.newThreadID;
   invariant(
-    ashoatThreadID,
+    ashoatThreadID && privateThreadID,
     'createThread should return either newThreadInfo or newThreadID',
   );
 
   let messageTime = Date.now();
   const ashoatMessageDatas = ashoatMessages.map((message) => ({
     type: messageTypes.TEXT,
     threadID: ashoatThreadID,
     creatorID: ashoat.id,
     time: messageTime++,
     text: message,
   }));
-  const [ashoatMessageInfos, threadsResult, userInfos] = await Promise.all([
-    createMessages(viewer, ashoatMessageDatas),
+  const privateMessageDatas = privateMessages.map((message) => ({
+    type: messageTypes.TEXT,
+    threadID: privateThreadID,
+    creatorID: squadbot.userID,
+    time: messageTime++,
+    text: message,
+  }));
+  const messageDatas = [...ashoatMessageDatas, ...privateMessageDatas];
+  const [messageInfos, threadsResult, userInfos] = await Promise.all([
+    createMessages(viewer, messageDatas),
     fetchThreadInfos(viewer),
     fetchKnownUserInfos(viewer),
   ]);
   const rawMessageInfos = [
-    ...privateThreadResult.newMessageInfos,
     ...ashoatThreadResult.newMessageInfos,
-    ...ashoatMessageInfos,
+    ...privateThreadResult.newMessageInfos,
+    ...messageInfos,
   ];
 
   return {
     id,
     rawMessageInfos,
     cookieChange: {
       threadInfos: threadsResult.threadInfos,
       userInfos: values(userInfos),
     },
   };
 }
 
 export default createAccount;